Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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