What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
