i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
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