Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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