Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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