Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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