I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
