thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize