I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
try to milk me bitch
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