My room smells like vodka and shame
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
