Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
