Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Randomize
