There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
