Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
