We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
