shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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