is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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