Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
