dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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