You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
