he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
this will be a night to untag.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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