Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen

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(971): View more from Oregon

So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.

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(620): View more from Kansas

my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts

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(708): View more from Illinois

Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?

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(605): View more from South Dakota

My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.

(202): View more from Washington, DC

We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.

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