The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
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