watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize