"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Randomize
