Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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