It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I bet he comes in French.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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