Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
