Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I'm just crazy horny about you
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
