Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
