today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
