She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize