I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
