So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
