You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize