It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
