Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
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