She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
