remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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