And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
