sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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