I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Are we still banned from the library?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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