i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
