Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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