I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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