spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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