writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
