Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
