So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Randomize
