When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize