Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
